more different herbal therapy

on this coast our come back was greeted with silence. no sherry. no
darin. an extra huge loft illuminating their absence.. particularly
in contrast to being surrounded by the loverlies across the bay. nyc is
thinning- people emigrated. need new blood or new land or maybe a new
source of candy + bubble tea. more bike riding?

faced w/ 12 days til chesstryoshka debut and many cards sent and no board to butress the
pieces. how can you cancel a debut?
no good i tell you. we think it might be because i'm me. too short.
too girly girl for the burly blue collars (holding my fabricating future hostage) to take seriously. starting to
understand why so many more experienced female architypes command their inner
bitch. we talk bitch strategy over miso soup. trying to get better at it,
but..
they leave me hanging... they leave me flat out and sundried with not even an aluminum pillow on which to lay my queen.

perhaps there are assertiveness courses? Bitchin' 101. or maybe a homeopathic remedy for increased bloodflow to the part of the brain in charge of sassiness.
stressballs a bit and hands tied.
the board. the board. the chessity chess chess board.
what to do about the #$#$% board.

at least the roommate hunt finally relented (or so they'd have us believe).
he makes zombie silkscreens with his whip-smart ladyfriend. ezzie made a funny on
the strangest response here.

poops.

gave myself a calming break today. union square farmer's almost all
flowers, herbs and mini trees. herbs planted and now adjusting to
their new low home. there is even direct sun for them from 5:15- 5:37 before it sets behind the recycling dump.
the plants and arwen are now the only ones i talk to.
i think my mouth is going to seal shut.

until my next audition. last one much better than first one.
still no guarantee these folks be looking for one bean and not another
legume. turns out m'lady is ms. design host casting director nyc and
auditioning may turn out to be my new part time job. unpaid job.